A Balloon Animal Funeral

I think it all started with the 4^th of July at the Cemetery.  That opening line, in and of itself, just sounds wrong, but it is the beginning point to this story.

On the 4^th of July, we went to watch the Tumwater fireworks.  We didn’t want to spend the $10 to park our car at the festival, plus there wasn’t any parking anyway.  There are plenty of places to watch the fireworks, but a vantage point worth considering was the Odd Fellows cemetery.  Now, please note that we weren’t the only people who decided upon this venue for spewing our ooohhhhs and aaaaahhhs for the 15 minute firework show we sat at least an hour to experience.

We maneuvered our Excursion, with Poppy and Gram, and the girls, down a narrow street at the cemetery.   Of course, all roads at cemeteries are narrow, so once we parked, we had the fun of watching others try to jockey for the perfect viewing point.

Ken, the girls and I, took a quick walk to the end of the entrance, just for something to do to occupy a few minutes.  Others had set up camp at the cemetery for a lot longer than we had, as evidenced by their grill, blankets, and low and behold – a Croquet set – winding easily through a few nearby headstones.  I cracked myself up when I expressed that there obviously was “No rest for the wicket” ……….I’m still laughing at my hilarity.

Back at the vehicle, the girls chose to do cartwheels in the grassy area nearby.  Again, doing cartwheels at a cemetery just sounds wrong, but when the cemetery is for  “Odd Fellows”, perhaps it isn’t that “odd”.

This was the girls’ first exposure to a cemetery.  We talked about the headstones, the meaning behind the numbers and dates, and marveled at how old some of the headstones were.

Ooooohhhhh AAAAHHHH  WOW – okay, fireworks are over. 

Now it is 4 days later. 

We went to the Farmer’s Market Sunday.  Jillian wanted a balloon animal.  Great.  Let’s go find the creepy man who makes them.  Jillian chose a butterfly (Bo) and Sloan chose a dog (Pinky).  I thought I heard “Deliverance” banjos start to play as the pink and blue latex was being twisted into somewhat recognizable things.  However, it was such a nice moment as the creepy man was teaching his 2 school –aged children the “family business”.  I really was creeped out, but the girls loved their balloons. 

The balloons came with a Guarantee – 100%  Guaranteed to pop! 

Bo – the butterfly, was the first to meet his demise.  Not entirely, just a wing.  But, as Jillian so exactly informed us, Mrs. Thome told them that a butterfly dies if it loses a wing.  Jillian was distraught.  I mean – boo hooing like Belle or Lucy had died, or if she had missed the most recent episode of “Good Luck Charlie”  - something more meaningful than just the popping of a balloon animal made by a large creepy man teaching his creepy children the creepy business of making balloon animals at a Farmer’s Market.

Next thing I knew, she had piled up a bit of cut grass, topped it off with flowers, and there was a handwritten note with “Bo’s” birthday and date of death.  She was still crying.

And, as I’m typing this, I have finally stopped crying.  My tears were of laughter – like I haven’t had in a very, very, very long time.

Today is 5 days since the “birth” of Bo and Pinky.  And today, Pinky is no longer.   Sloan, contrary to Jillian, was not distressed at all about Pinky becoming airless.  She had more fun playing with the lone, last, long, pink balloon that was used as Pinky’s leash.

I was busy working at the kitchen table – Real Estate, not cooking.  The girls came to inform me that they were having a funeral and I was invited.  They needed a piece of bread – for the communion of course.  They remembered this from Uncle Don’s funeral, and have expressed a concern as to who was going to hold the basket of bread at Aunt Jerre’s funeral since she had held it at Don’s.  But, I digress.

Finally the funeral was to start.  Gram and I went to the lower back deck.  We waited, and waited, while arrangements were finalized between 2   7 year olds. 

First, came the directions.  We were not to talk or get up until the funeral was over.  Got it.

Next  came the pink, wooden tray with a bowl of bread, and an empty bowl which had water in it.  The girls were carrying it down the grassy hill and the water had spilled.  Luckily the sides of the tray kept the water from completely disappearing.  This came in extremely handy when Jillian took the orange Solo cup and scooped up the water for us to dip our bread in.  It was at this point when I completely,  totally, without any ability to control my laughter, LOST IT!  The sight of Jillian tilting the tray, scooping up the water, was more than I could take.  I have no idea why, but I just couldn’t stop laughing.  The “formality” of this funeral for 2 balloon animals, made by a creepy man, teaching his creepy kids the family business of making balloon animals at a Farmer’s Market, had just descended to something so completely irreverent and hysterically funny the tears were running down my leg!!!

Of course, being the awesome and sensitive mom that I am (not), I pretended I was crying over the loss of these 2 new members of our family.  After all, the girls had gone to such extremes that I certainly didn’t want to hurt their little feelings. 

On the table was 3 more orange Solo cups.  I noticed that the middle one wasn’t stacked tightly with the others.  So, just out of curiosity, I pulled it out of the others…..never in my wildest dreams would I guess what I would find.

Tied to the bottom of the cup with the remaining strip of latex balloon from Bo the butterfly, was a dollar bill.  I was “awarded” the prize at the funeral. Woo Hoo -  I just made a buck!!!

I was then asked to say a prayer.  It went something like this:

Dearly  Beloved, we are gathered here today to pay our respects to our longtime family members, Bo and Pinky.  They were the best creepy balloons we’ve ever had, and we will miss them as they’ve turn into airless pieces of latex.  We will remember them always, or at least until Thursday.  Amen”

The service then ended with the Pledge of Allegiance. 

The end.

And to think, I took a break from doing a market analysis for an upcoming foreclosure listing for this!!!  The complete and utter joy of working at home!